I'm a total outsider to all parties involved here , but your male privilege in positing yourself as the voice of reason here is really, really showing, and it's not helpful.
Initially I gave this a pass, but I wanted to say thank you for staying engaged and contributing your views. You're welcome in my LJ whether you agree with me or not, whether you like me or not.
Since you don't know the people involved, I'd like to say that I didn't posit myself as a voice of reason. If you care to walk backward through the earlier discussion you can see that my responses came out of my own emotional reactions, not least of which was that the evening Judah showed up at the party I had just been to the memorial service for a friend of mine. So I was myself on quite a thin emotional edge. That other people have called me a voice of reason does indeed make me happy, and I'm proud that I've been able to think through my emotional tidal wave without denying that it exists.
Second, I think you might check the first comment here as well as others where Song has responded to gather her views of what I'm doing. She and I continue to have significant disagreements, but we are doing so in a respectful and cooperative manner. Most importantly, she and I share a unifying goal of creating safer communities. So long as the discussion leads us toward that I plan to continue.
Finally, I'm aware of my privileges. I cannot make myself un-white, un-cis-male, un-able, and so on. I am well aware that I have racist, sexist, ageist, able-ist and other thoughts and feelings and those things get into my words and actions. I don't think I can purge myself of my *isms any more than I can magic-wand away my privilege. If I'm acting blindly then I expect and hope to be called on it. However, I don't think that's the case here.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2014-07-12 02:40 pm (UTC)Initially I gave this a pass, but I wanted to say thank you for staying engaged and contributing your views. You're welcome in my LJ whether you agree with me or not, whether you like me or not.
Since you don't know the people involved, I'd like to say that I didn't posit myself as a voice of reason. If you care to walk backward through the earlier discussion you can see that my responses came out of my own emotional reactions, not least of which was that the evening Judah showed up at the party I had just been to the memorial service for a friend of mine. So I was myself on quite a thin emotional edge. That other people have called me a voice of reason does indeed make me happy, and I'm proud that I've been able to think through my emotional tidal wave without denying that it exists.
Second, I think you might check the first comment here as well as others where Song has responded to gather her views of what I'm doing. She and I continue to have significant disagreements, but we are doing so in a respectful and cooperative manner. Most importantly, she and I share a unifying goal of creating safer communities. So long as the discussion leads us toward that I plan to continue.
Finally, I'm aware of my privileges. I cannot make myself un-white, un-cis-male, un-able, and so on. I am well aware that I have racist, sexist, ageist, able-ist and other thoughts and feelings and those things get into my words and actions. I don't think I can purge myself of my *isms any more than I can magic-wand away my privilege. If I'm acting blindly then I expect and hope to be called on it. However, I don't think that's the case here.