More childish ranting

[drwex]

Dear Food Vendors

Under no circumstances should an object sold as "salad" have more grease on it than a stack of pizzas.

Also, while I'm on the topic, a chopped up quarter head of iceberg lettuce drenched in the aforementioned grease and lightly decorated with one small wedge of tomato, two olives, and 4 CC of chopped onions is NOT under any reasonable definition a 'salad.'

No love,
Me

(Seriously, folks, I could've lubed the entire chassis of a small passenger car with this lake of grease.)
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And while I'm feeling childish, let me pass this advisory on to random writers of business emails:

If you are going to address what ought to be professional correspondence to me then why on earth do you - who do not know me at all - feel comfortable addressing the correspondence to a common misspelling of my first name, without even a vague attempt at an honorific? I feel completely justified in responding to you with a misspelling of YOUR first name.

Or at least my inner five-year-old feels that way.