More childish ranting

[drwex]

Dear Food Vendors

Under no circumstances should an object sold as "salad" have more grease on it than a stack of pizzas.

Also, while I'm on the topic, a chopped up quarter head of iceberg lettuce drenched in the aforementioned grease and lightly decorated with one small wedge of tomato, two olives, and 4 CC of chopped onions is NOT under any reasonable definition a 'salad.'

No love,
Me

(Seriously, folks, I could've lubed the entire chassis of a small passenger car with this lake of grease.)
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And while I'm feeling childish, let me pass this advisory on to random writers of business emails:

If you are going to address what ought to be professional correspondence to me then why on earth do you - who do not know me at all - feel comfortable addressing the correspondence to a common misspelling of my first name, without even a vague attempt at an honorific? I feel completely justified in responding to you with a misspelling of YOUR first name.

Or at least my inner five-year-old feels that way.

Comments

[trowa-barton.livejournal.com]

Reminds me of the Bud Light commercial:
Bud Light Presents Real Men of Genius

Today we salute you Mr. Giant Taco Salad Inventor
A culinary invention that baffles the human mind,
a twelve thousand calorie salad.
Ground beef, refried beans, guacamole,
cheese, sour cream and, if there is any room left,
a few shreads of lettuce.
Some may ask, is your Taco Salad Healthy?
Of course it is, it's a salad isn't it?
So crack open an ice cold budlight, conquistador of the calorie.
You put the feast in fiesta.

[chienne-folle.livejournal.com]

It's scary that you know this.

Just sayin'. :-)

[trowa-barton.livejournal.com]

Don't get me started on "No Sex in the Champagne Room"

Apparently I should watch more TV

[drwex]

'cause I'm missing something here.

[chienne-folle.livejournal.com]

I hear you about the name. I often get mail addressed to "Corey." I don't know why the extra "e" makes me so livid, but it does. And having an androgynous name means that I often get mail addressed to Mr. Cory Lastname. The Democratic party wants Mr. Cory Lastname to send them a thousand dollars. Gee. Too bad for you guys that Mr. Cory Lastname DOES NOT EXIST.

Yeah, I guess it's easy to become childish over this stuff. :-)

[lachesis.livejournal.com]

My mom gets stuff addressed to "Louis" all the time. Her name is LOIS. And she doesn't live here.

What's worse, I've been getting some of that mail here, to it which I take great delight and a giant, black marker writing "RTS NO SUCH NAME".

[intuition-ist.livejournal.com]

sometimes, one Really Needs to let one's inner child jump up and down and yell really loudly and scribble on the walls with a permanent marker. it's good for the soul. :)

[halleyscomet.livejournal.com]

It's not childish if Mark Twain did the same sort of thing (http://www.lettersofnote.com/2010/01/youre-idiot-of-33rd-degree.html).

[sariel-t.livejournal.com]

*hug* You're still awesome.

Thanks babe

[drwex]

I'm just _childishly_ awesome.