Restore my faith in humanity, why dontcha

[drwex]

This morning, I got a surprise invite to a group chat from a gamer friend. He wanted to tell a lot of people all at once (the vast majority of us gamers) that he was coming out as trans. He still chooses to use male pronouns and hasn't changed his name but he identifies as something not-male/not-female right now and was acutely aware that his blood family was not reacting well. So he came to us.

The chat was tear-inducingly awesome. People were congratulating, cheering, offering hugs/support/brunch and generally validating this person's life choices.

I know I live in a special social bubble - most of you reading this live in that bubble with me and make it a place unlike other places, for which I am grateful. But I also live in the world of gaming, which is still awash in sexism, rampant homophobia, and not-particularly-covert racism. To see that people are not all awful examplars of the worst elements of their subculture really made my morning.

I was recently chatting with sovay in LJ comments about liking problematic things. For me, gaming is one of those problematic things I dearly love. Days like today give me hope that it won't always be so.

Comments

[rednikki.livejournal.com]

Is gaming inherently problematic, though, or is it specific people in gaming that are the problem? Maybe I've gotten lucky over the years; I've had the good fortune to always game with diverse groups.

[drwex]

You are familiar with Gamergate? If not, hoo boy. Um, start here: http://www.vox.com/2014/9/6/6111065/gamergate-explained-everybody-fighting

And if you can stomach it, go here for a view into the problems with tabletop gaming: http://latining.tumblr.com/post/141567276944/tabletop-gaming-has-a-white-male-terrorism-problem

[rednikki.livejournal.com]

Yes, I'm familiar with both of these. Again, is it the act of gaming that is problematic or is it the people involved?

[drwex]

The people, clearly. I know dozens of female gamers and I don't think any of them would say that the problematic thing is gaming-qua-gaming, it's the community. As the latining post describes, lots of people game, but privately because of the toxic community.

[mizarchivist]

<3
I'm glad you were able to share in that moment!