drwex: (Troll)
[personal profile] drwex
...is to write more. So I'm going to write some words now and maybe write more words later. I also likely will do at least one music post.

How am I? Physically healthy. Anxious a lot. Crying now and then.

Still unemployed. No serious prospects on that front - came in second on Friday for the last place I'd had an actual interview with. They were very nice about it, but second is still no job. I've expanded my job search outside MA for the first time since I moved here. Right now I'm looking at NYC and Philly areas and I expect to expand down to DC and then add Seattle and Portland. Pygment has vetoed Silicon Valley.

Beyond that? I dunno, maybe Vancouver and see if emigration is possible? Austin and RTP are also things I might consider but so much of my stress is based on the politics and one-third of this country that is actively hostile to me and my family that I'm not sure it would help to move to either of those places.

We're actually doing OK at the moment. My 'ant' brain is the biggest part of me doing the "told you so" dance. Pygment's work is good, and I've got unemployment so all the bills are getting paid. We're pushing off or cutting expenses as we can. I'd like to be able to spend attention on things that are not money-related - that would certainly ease some of the stress.

Life With Teenagers remains an adventure, though a different sort from the friends I see who have younger children (sometimes literally) crawling over them. Thing 1 is a troglodyte. We see her only when she needs something, usually food. That needs to change but trying to have that conversation with her is also a big source of stress so I'm avoiding it, mostly.

Thing 2 is bored beyond words and resentful that I won't play more games with them. I've realized the fundamental difference in our styles: they want games where they get to press buttons constantly. I want games where I get to think and make choices about which button to press next. Neither is right or wrong - just incompatible.

This week I finally finished a thing that I should have done like 8 weeks back. Inside me the "yay" voices are drowned out by the "see that was easy why didn't you just do that two months ago?" voices.

And so it goes. How are you?

Date: 2020-05-12 04:03 pm (UTC)
pygment: (2 heads > 1 AKA Home)
From: [personal profile] pygment
<3 you so much

Date: 2020-05-12 04:38 pm (UTC)
reedrover: (Default)
From: [personal profile] reedrover
Hello again!

The issue with doing things is a constant with me, usually around the tiniest of inconveniences. I need to turn off a light. The door directly by the light switch is locked. So that requires either finding keys or going through the shop and out the back and around into the shed/hallway (it's complicated to describe). It's been three days.

Date: 2020-05-13 01:04 pm (UTC)
reedrover: (Default)
From: [personal profile] reedrover
Thank you for the offer. I'm happy to read about your experiences and possibly trade messages but I'm not interested in talking about it right now.

Date: 2020-05-12 05:33 pm (UTC)
redbird: closeup of me drinking tea, in a friend's kitchen (Default)
From: [personal profile] redbird
I'm managing okay, I think; some stress, and not doing as much exercise as I'd like (even though I do most of my exercise in the apartment).

Very much missing [personal profile] adrian_turtle and [personal profile] rysmiel, and the generality of people who aren't [personal profile] cattitude.

Date: 2020-05-13 09:26 pm (UTC)
flexagon: (Default)
From: [personal profile] flexagon
There are a LOT of excellent teachers / trainers online now. Interactive Zoom classes turn out to work pretty well for some things!

Date: 2020-05-13 03:06 am (UTC)
dianec42: Photo of me with purple hair (Purple hair)
From: [personal profile] dianec42
Thanks for the update! Don't move to LA, it's a silly place. :)

I've recently discovered that a large part of my brain is waiting for everything to go back to normal. Brain & I had a talk. I'm much less stuck now.

I should write more......

Date: 2020-05-13 03:50 am (UTC)
dianec42: Photo of me with purple hair (Purple hair)
From: [personal profile] dianec42
P.S. My "ant brain" is doing the same dance for buying Himself TWO large packages of contact lens stuff back in February. When I said "I'm not going out again" I meant it!

Date: 2020-05-13 02:41 pm (UTC)
dianec42: Cartoon character Daria reading a newspaper (Daria)
From: [personal profile] dianec42
Oh, sorry, the Himself there was The Husband. Who actually seemed a bit put out that I'd bought extra. I replied that I'd had a hard day and did not want to ever leave the house again. Who knew that would be so accurate? :)

Date: 2020-05-13 02:12 pm (UTC)
gale_storm: (Default)
From: [personal profile] gale_storm
What's this 'normal' people refer to lately? It seems like it's just another mash-up of ways in which people get to fight about sh!t that can never be decided or it's something ... aw, dammit, I just had to enter 'seeing things in the desert is called' into Google to find the word that had been eluding me was 'mirage.'

And I'm leaving this comment, even though I am tempted to erase it. Pfeh.

Date: 2020-05-13 09:32 pm (UTC)
flexagon: (home)
From: [personal profile] flexagon
Can your job be done remotely? If so... you could look everywhere!! WFH is going to be much more of a thing in coming years.

Date: 2020-05-16 06:04 pm (UTC)
etana: Cupcake in pink wrapper with rainbow above frosting head (Default)
From: [personal profile] etana
Ooof the shame felt when finally doing a thing is real! It isn’t helpful and it isn’t legitimate, in that there should be no shame in getting a thing done - only joy at completing it. But I understand too well, friend. I’m cheering for you.

I’m hiding in my bedroom a lot, riding my stationary bicycle less than I should and afraid to leave the house (I live in a hot spot area of Boston). But writing. Writing is good.

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drwex

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